June 28th – What Have We Learned?

So what have we learned today? I, for one, have learned the following:

I figured out what separates humans from all other animals and mammals on earth. It’s NOT opposable thumbs. It’s air conditioning.

I learned that, in running, there is a gadget for everything. I found a sock that keeps your toes bent at an incline while you sleep, so that you wake up without much pain from plantar fasciitis. It looks like something made in the labs within the Imagination Pavilion at Epcot by Dr. Nigel Channing.

I discovered that I should not be allowed to associate with other humans in a decaffinated state.

My dog is smarter than me. At least she knows to stretch before doing anything remotely active. I, on the other hand, I will only be able to touch my toes if someone does me the favor of chopping them off and handing then to me. I am an inflexible tool.

Tomorrow: the Pride Run in Central Park.

2 thoughts on “June 28th – What Have We Learned?”

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