Today was a rest day for me. Plain and simple. It was one of those days where everything simply hurt. You ever have one of those mornings where you wake up, slowly attempt to get out of bed, you place your foot on the floor, gently place a little weight on it, and all at once your hamstring, quadricep, and calf muscles collectively begin to curse at you like a bunch of drunken Irish sailors on a three day pass in some seedy bar in Singapore (and I’m not talking about the financial district here, I’m talking about those bars near the airport where the taxi drivers demand extra to take you there)? (Wow – I just went back and re-read that last sentence, and Sr. Petrina – my third grade teacher – just mentally whacked upside the head with a ruler, yelling “that was a run-on sentence!) That was me this morning. My body sent me a message of “knock this pain thing off, or else I’m gonna hurt you.”
I was so sore this morning that even my kneecaps got into the act – and the kneecaps are the Wormtongue on the human body (and yes, I used a Lord of the Rings reference, simply because the moment truly called for it), because the knee is the part of the leg that always like to instigate conflict. Think about that for a moment: it sits in between two of the largest bones in the human anatomy, acting like the DMZ between the pavement and your torso. A few hours after a strong tempo run, while I’m sitting in my office in the middle of typing up some nastygram to someone who probably doesn’t deserve my wrath (but hey: I was hungry and the deli screwed up my breakfast order by throwing a slice cheese on my bacon & egg sandwich – and not just any cheese, mind you, but that awful no-name cheese you buy by the 10 pound block at some Cost Co in a strip mall that has a half-life like a Twinkie), my left knee sends an instant message to my brain…and the brain knows that the knee is just looking to stir up the drama:
JLK (The knee is a drama hound, so it goes with initials just to seem like a cooler part of the anatomy than it really is) (the initials stand for Joe’s Left Knee, by the way….ok, moving on…): “Yo. Sup. U up?”
Brain: “I’m in the middle of dealing with work. What’s the issue?”
JLK: “U know that run we did this morning? Well u need to chill with that. U feelin me?”
Brain: “If by ‘U feelin me’ you are asking whether I understand that we over-did it this morning a bit, yes I comprehend your message. We’re going to rest for the remainder of the day. ….and it’s “you”, not “U”. We have a college degree – you know, because you were there.”
JLK: “Stop hatin’ on me like that, yo. And just for that English lesson, I’m gonna swell up a bit and tick you off.”
Stomach: “….seriously? cheese? on our bacon & egg? The chef is a neanderthal.”
Brain: “Fine – swell up and I’ll make sure he puts in 10 miles before you wake up. And stop leaving off letters on words – you’re not a Kardashian”.
JLK: “OK then – consider your bluff called. I’m swelling up as we text. See how you like your walk home this evening. Peace out.”
Stomach: “ummmmmm……hello? What are we doing about this whole cheese fiasco?”
Brain: “I’m lashing out meaninglessly in an email to one of my vendors. You happy now?”
Stomach: “ummmm….no….was kinda hoping for an Oreo as an apology….”
So this evening I’m heading to a charity event, and providing quality wine to my stomach to apologize for this morning’s horrid experience. I’m also hoping that my knees will see a fine cabernet as an olive branch for over-working things this week. And my brain….well….the wine will act like Tylenol.
I’m logging these miles and competing in these events this year in order to raise awareness and donations to fight Spinal Muscular Atrophy – the number one genetic killer of kids under the age of two in the world. If you’d like more information, or check out what our charity is all about, please go to our website at Do Away With SMA. We are also on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram!!!
If you want to donate to our cause and help fight SMA, you can find our event on CrowdRise:
My Overall Numbers Since March 12th 2018
Strength Training: 1 hour
Time: 1 hour
If you’d like to follow my lunacy, here’s how you can do it:
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